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Category Archives: Fridays are for Lists

Friday List Day is back…100 things..

We’re going back to basics on this one. If you need to catch up go here… 100 Things Chapter 1 and then here… 100 things part Dos

Okay here are the early years of Randa Dawn…

70. For, I believe, at least one year of my life I was Wonder Woman. I have told this before but I like to brag. I mean I watched the show (I remember an episode where WW was spinning around tied up in a chair to transform). I wore under-roos that had the stars on the butt and the top like W.W. And I would not answer to Miranda, or Randa. When I was almost done with the phase, my awesome uncle made me wrist cuffs, headband and lasso (Lassoop, I called it) and I was thrown right back in. Mom was “overjoyed” to say the least. The sad thing is, there is only one picture of me as W.W. and that was a Halloween picture from preschool. Mom thinks that the reason she has no evidence was because she got wrapped up into watching me play this character she forgot to record it.
69. I used to also pretend to be a dog. So much so that I wore holes in the knees of every pair of pants I had. The went on well into 3rd grade.
68. I would pretend to be a dog in Church and I barked at the Priest, and I also lifted my leg to a pew…My sister was so glad to be related to me.
67. My best friend when I was in kindergarten to 4th grade was a boy named John. I would say his last name but then you would google him and get to make fun of him about how we used to play My Little Ponies and SheRa all the time. That’s right. He had the greatest room EVER. It was huge! I want to go back to that house to see if it really was, or if it was because I was small.
66. He stopped being my friend in 4th grade, and we were never really friends again, and I never really knew why. It was probably because I turned into a total bitch.
65. I met John’s “roommate” at a friend’s wedding a couple years back. He wanted dirt about him, I told him about the ponies. It came as no surprise to him because apparently John is gay. I had no idea, honestly. The last time I saw him he was a total Frat guy. I also told his roommate to make sure that if John tried to say that the Ponies were his sisters, to call him on it. They were his. He even had the castle. Man I miss those days.
64. One day when my mom went to the store my sister was being mean to me so I packed up all of my ponies and “ran away” all the way to the weird fern bush in the front yard, where I pretended I had a fort.
63. I don’t have many memories before the second grade. I can remember my first grade teacher, but nothing about the first grade.
62. My first memory of school though was getting pushed in the swings by my sister’s friend and thinking that I was going to go over the bar.
61. My first second grade memory was of two boys talking about my friend who was “the new girl” and how she was “the cutest girl in the class.” That always made me jealous, but I still liked her.
60. That friend and I would go on to get into a lot of trouble together. Not real trouble just dumb stuff.
59. I would play pretend so much by myself that I hardly remember much of my family when I was little.
58. I used to fall asleep before dinner and then get woken up by my sisters and think it was the next day.
57. My sisters liked to get me to talk in my sleep a lot too. They would ask me questions, which would end up getting me hit by one of them.
56. I never noticed until a little while back but my mom had a pattern to our names…The girls had M names, with the middle name having 4 letters, and the boys had A names. Which is interesting because my dad has an M name(well not his “given” name) and my mom has an A name. hmmm.
55. My grandma used to say “Colder then a Witches Tit” and I never knew that was a bad saying until one day we went to the grocery store and I said it really loud and she shooshed me. I didn’t know WHY it was a bad saying, until High School. Yeah, I’m slow.
54. I was the typical shy 3 year old, but when someone asked me “What does your mom call you” I said “Her little food and farter.” My mom’s proudest day with me.
53. I was the shortest girl in my class until I think 7th grade. Then everyone stopped growing and I kept going. I still wish I wouldn’t have stopped at just 5’9″ though.
52. Oh! I got a wart on my tonsils! Right around the time my youngest brother was born. I remember mom was gone and I had to get a shot in my butt. And it actually choked me, I remember not being able to breath at times. My oldest sister told me that she told dad that I stopped breathing and he said “Oh she’s just snoring” and then I got the shot…Then I had to go to Bend, (Closest big town) to the doctor and he went in and snipped it out, then teased me. He asked if I wanted to keep it and I was all for it, but no, I didn’t get to keep my tonsil wart.
51. I only had one boyfriend before meeting Jesse. His name was Jason, and I was in the fourth grade. My sister told me he was using me for our Nintendo. He broke up with me because I wouldn’t wear a stupid bracelet that he bought me. I also never kissed him. I wasn’t very sad that he broke up with me.
50. We had a Cocker Spaniel named Muffin, who would follow me to the bus stop almost every day. She also laid in the middle of the road a lot, but never got hit by a car. I also had another dog named Rascal, who “ran away” or so THEY told me, but then when I was older my oldest sister said “Oh he probably got ran over or something.” They’re so cruel to me.

There you go, some history…Next time…Who knows where I’ll take this list!!

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Posted by on December 17, 2009 in 100 things, Fridays are for Lists

 

My Thoughts for the day

I think all this nonsense about “interviewing” people on blogs is just a contest to see which blogger is this witty-est. Yes I know that’s not a word. But really it all seems like a pissing contest to me. “My questions are funnier then yours!” “yeah well my interviewee is a better blogger then yours!”
Really this is just because I’m jealous because I’m not a famous enough blogger to be interviewed and I really am not a good enough journalist to actually interview anyone.Maybe I’ll do it anyway…who wants me to question them?!

Oh and a thought about my last post in which I said that I would have
Eminem
Mariah Carey
Beyonce
Ben Folds
Josh Groban.
I have to expand. And probably take out Beyonce. Because honestly I only like her most recent CD. And her music isn’t diverse enough for me to really enjoy.
Eminem I would love to have because he changes so drastically yet stays the same from his very first CD to now.
Mariah well because I love her. And she has a lot of CDs to listen to.
Ben Folds because really? He’s awesome, I saw him live and I loved him.
Josh Groban, because I like singing in Italian!
I think I will trade Beyonce for Red Hot Chili Peppers. Yeah! That makes me hip right?! Because that’s what I’m going for here. HIP. Wait, no, Outkast. Yes! I love Outkast.

CDs that I would not have(and my reasons):
Dave Mathews Band-I have NEVER liked this band. And yes I went to college. I can’t stand his voice. He was funny on SNL but still don’t like his music.

Bob Marley-I am not technically a white person because I do not like Bob Marley. I don’t even really like reggae music all that much. I’ll listen to it if it’s on, but I’m not going out to reggae concerts.

U2– I know I’m not the only one to had Bono and his stupid sunglasses. I hate them. Like vehemently. More then I hate the word Hubby.

Pearl Jam-Do they sing “Don’t call me Daughter?” because that’s the dumbest song ever.

Pink Floyd-I don’t have an explanation, just never got into them, never liked it.

The Beatles-Now I like a couple songs. I will sing a long because my mom had their album and yes I know some lyrics. But if I were a fan of Rock Band I wouldn’t go out and buy the Beatles version. They’re not that great!

Jack Johnson-he reminds me of this soccer player I knew in college. Total bone head.

 

Friday List Day!

So I had to actually go in to a real job today! My first day as a Wal-Mart employee! It was boring, I hate training, just a lot of safety stuff. We’ll see, if I paid attention well enough I won’t get hurt.
So I’m phoning it in by giving a list of email subjects and various one liners that Leslie and I say…

First off you can’t not put something funny in a subject line here are the best from Leslie:
Next thing you know…
Bitch Bitch Bitch
Oregon Trail
Ty Cronin+pubic hair?
I hate yogurt
Juan es muy guapo
Hey, Durty
There’s a rat in my butt
Spectacular hobo
Snap your bagles
Ex-boyfriends should get wiener punched
Oops I crapped my pants
Shame cave
Sorry Roger, you tiger now
Mirando Pando
Evil Shenanigans
I’m such a disappointment
Sunshine pants
Consider me Miles Davis
The music moves me, but it moves me ugly
I’m allergic to rocks hitting me in the face
BY THE WAY WHORE
Not in a totally dirty way
Sexy bike gang
MEOW
There’s no time for pleasantries
Oh yeah…meow
Turkey butts will chase you while your sleeping
I’m a Nigerian Prince!

Here’s a list of My subjects TO Leslie, because I’m funny too damnit!!
I’m so sneeky you can’t even hear me take a shower
Stupid Llamas
Punching Weiners
Balls
Whore!
Shut it Jack! You shut your dirty manwhore mouth!

And then well the rest of them are just RE’s back to her. I’m only funny when I’m drunk.

So all of these usually don’t have anything to do with what is being said in the email. Which makes them all the better and more funny.

And this was what was said today while at Wal-Mart:
“I will slap a sicky!”

And this was said right after I said I’ll probably have to write all this down”
“do it with the wrong hand!!”

Going to work and blogging is tough work, I now know why so many SAHM do it! haha! BURN! Kidding! Loves!
Oh and can I just say that the day that I have to go to work something huge blows up in the blogging world and I had to catch up?! Sick and wrong! I missed Twitter today. I did!

 
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Posted by on November 13, 2009 in Fridays are for Lists

 

Fridays are for Lists about ME!

I just made that up, can you tell? But I think with this whole “post a day” thing I need some themes. Soooo Fridays now will be odd things about me. Maybe just five at a time. I don’t want to freak you out all at once!
To get started here are five things about me that some of you might know but most of you don’t.

1. I don’t like dim lit rooms. My dreams are most of the time super realistic except the fact that they’re just a little low on the light factor. So in my waking hours I need light or else I don’t know if I’m dreaming or not. I swear to God I’m not kidding about this. My lights in my bedroom has two bulbs and if one is out it bugs me and I have to have the other replaced. And even if there is light in the living room I still have to turn on a light when I go into the kitchen even though I can still see. Which is why we need those energy efficient light bulbs. Now don’t get huffy so soon, I do actually turn them off when I leave the room, it’s just when I’m in the room that I need the light.

2. I am a sleep-aholic. I love to sleep and have my whole life. I love two hour naps and would go to sleep at 8:30 when Oscar does just to get more of it. My favorite quote from Brak (Space Ghost Coast to Coast) is “I love sleeping, I wish I could wake up just so I can go back to sleep.” But the downside of me sleeping a lot is my dreams, which if I get woken up get progressively more weird.

3. I have re-occurring dreams a lot. And most of them are apocalyptic in nature. The ones that reoccur, that is. They usually tend to have aliens in them too. And gigantic space ships and fighter jets. Oh and I dream almost every night, and tend to remember my dreams but I can never explain them as well as I see them. Which is terrible. I’m the worst dream teller in the world. Jesse won’t listen to me when I want to tell him about a dream. This is one good thing about having his mom here she lets me tell her my terrible dream stories.

4. I don’t think I could ever actually have a list of 100 things about me. That would take me forever. Because I’m pretty normal and boring. It would be a list that everyone would say “uh yeah doesn’t everyone do that?” Part of that list would be something like: I watch too much TV. I am left handed. I am the only one in my family with curly hair and hazel eyes oh and the only lefty. I have a big Catholic family.etc. etc.

5. I don’t like when women get into male dominated jobs and then have to decorate everything with pink. If I were able to be a mechanic I would just be a really good mechanic and not turn my business pink. Sure if you like the color I get it but really it just seems like they do it because pink is a “female” color and women identify with that color. I didn’t own a pink shirt until three years ago, and it’s my only one. I don’t identify myself as a woman just by a color.

 
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Posted by on November 6, 2009 in Fridays are for Lists