The Great Baby Debate

09 Feb

I have a sneeking suspicion that Jesse wants a baby. Yeah that’s right, I don’t want one, JESSE does. I swear. Okay maybe it’s because there’s baby fever going around and fifty million women are pregnant and happy. But my heart is for some reason really really suffering from baby fever. And they stare at me at work, by the way. Any time a woman with a baby under one comes through my line the baby looks at me and smiles. I SWEAR TO GOD! And they whisper to me. “Raaannnnddddaaaa you know you want a baby!” And I say “NO BABY! I DON’T WANT ANOTHER ONE!” And then Oscar doesn’t cuddle with me and I want a baby.

Okay so I don’t want to go all mushy on you or freak you out but I’ve been feeling less then whole lately. You know that feeling that religious people always talk about and then they have a spiritual movement or something? That’s what’s going on right now, in my heart. Yeah I said it. I’m a little worried about putting this out there for the ridicule I will endure from friends and relatives. But this is what is going on. I feel like it’s time now, it’s time to add to my heart. I have been thinking even about adopting but I know we can’t afford that, and we can’t foster because we only have a three bedroom house and apparently rules here in WA are that the foster kid has to have their own room. What is that all about?? I think though I am going to keep yearning for a baby and keep my IUD in place for a while. Like I said in the previous post, I want to get back into shape. I want to be healthy, and I think I’ll do that and get some good habits in place before subjecting my body to that again, and maybe the next time I’ll cope better. Who knows. All this is are thoughts that run through my head. And I have to get them out there so they don’t drive me crazy.

So I know everyone has an opinion on when to have babies. What do you think is a good age spread? I honestly am thinking of taking my mom’s advise and waiting until he’s at least 5, because as she says Oscar demands attention, and if I had one now who knows what he would do. And I would end up being a haggard mess.


Posted by on February 9, 2010 in Introspection


2 responses to “The Great Baby Debate

  1. joceycakes

    February 9, 2010 at 10:18 pm

    Haha! I have not had a baby yet, but my uterus aches sometimes. At the farmers market, in the mall, on the street… wherever a baby is in a too big jacket, with teeny tiny mitties might be… oh ache ache uterus wants them in me. Biological desire takes over momentary!
    My sis and I are 3 years apart, and I think its a perfect age difference; she’s def older but we’re still best friends!
    Good luck with your urges 🙂
    Have a great night!!

  2. Katie

    February 10, 2010 at 7:23 am

    oh boy! I truly believe that no child should be an only child … but why listen to me?? I came from a family of 5, me being the oldest (and best and smartest … ok so I made that up) and essentially the only because as you know it took Mom 4 years to talk Dad into having another child then she has HER ~ eww, Thank God I love her now but back then man o man she was annoying! I digress .. the next one came along when I was 5+ years old and I really think that was really hard on me because I had ALL the attention and time spent on ME by all the adults in my little world. Then I go and do that to my 1st born son … but I had to leave his father and marry my husband now before I could get the other 2 boys … I think that the 3 years between the 2 younger boys is perfect, they play together at home (ok so some people may view it as fighting) they miss each other when one is gone and they stand up for each other at school. They are a team, then I see my oldest one and think damn I robbed him and spoiled him all at the same time .. maybe that’s why I spoil him the way that I do is because of the guilt that I feel for not giving him another sibling soon enough.
    My opinion … and only my opinion ~ have another one and soon!


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