Loving Myself.

I’m doing a 30 days sort of deal but not all at once because I can’t think that much. So you’re getting them when I wanna give them to you. So “day two” is

“Something you love about yourself”

I love that I have empathy for people. Well almost all people. Like my high school AP History Teacher said: “I am only bigoted towards bigots.” It’s hard to have feelings for everyone, it’s hard to look at someone and say “I haven’t been through what you’ve been through but let me feel for you.” I like that I can do that. I like that when a person yells at me for empty shelves at a store I have no control over and tells me that their battling cancer, all I focus on is the fact that they’re battling cancer, and forget that they’re mad at “me.” and I like that all I really wanted to do was hug that woman. And tell her it was going to be okay, and that she was a strong brave woman. I love that I’m sitting here crying about it just typing it out.
I love that I I can take people’s pain into my own. And that I can listen to people, and really feel emotions.

Something else I love about me? I can let go of things. I truly look at things as “small things” and tend to let go. Sure I will bitch and complain for a bit. But then after I get all that out, I will let go. Unless it’s a big deal. If it’s something near and dear to my heart I will not let it go. I will hold on to it in my heart and not let anyone know it is bothering me until I explode. Which isn’t something that I love, but it’s something I do.

I love that I can deal with any type of person. I have a high tolerance for stupidity. I will talk shit about the stupid person. But I will tolerate them. Why? Because sometimes it’s just easier. I don’t look for fights but if a fight comes to me I won’t back down. I also like that about myself.

I like that I will have the ability to teach my son tolerance, and love. I love that I will be able to tell him honestly that it’s better to love everyone then to carry hate and to bully. I love that I can smile on days when all I want to do is sit and cry for the world. It’s hard to do, but I do it. I smile all day long and try my hardest to make at least one person feel better.

 

Learning from other Blogs

I’m learning as I go here. Well I’ve been “blogging” for a little while. Almost four years I think. I know that’s not as long as some out there, but long for me. But mostly it’s just been a journal for me and some family members. Anyway as time has gone on and I have found other blogs I am amazed at how juvenile my blog is. How terrible my pictures are. Now this is not me fishing for complements, this is just my brain. I’m giving you a peek…ha…well see my brain always compares me to everyone else around me. And for some reason my brain always has me coming up short. It’s just the way it is. I’ve never been number one. I tried working on this with my counselor but apparently I was “fixed” because I stopped crying at every session. Ahhh how the brain likes to trick me. Anyway, I’m finding new blogs here and there and most of them I like. You can look to your left and see a good list of blogs that I read and like a lot. I have found some new one just recently that have been around for YEARS but they’re new to me.
What I have noticed is that I am poor. I can’t afford to get my own website. I can’t afford an awesome camera to take pictures. I can’t afford to have photo shop on my computer to fix those pictures. So here I am, just typing. And hoping that someone out there is reading.
Something else that I have found is that you can tell who likes who. There is a big sense of the “cool” crowd and the “rebel” or as we called them in high school “the stoner” group. I liked all groups. I flitted around and didn’t really care. The stoners were okay with me, and the preppy kids liked me too I guess. Anyway point being I found one blog and I don’t know if I want to be specific or not but MAN! I could instantly tell what blogs “they” followed, without looking at “their” blog roll. I knew right away just from the pictures, because they looked oddly photoshoppy familiar. And I thought to myself…hmmmm…how do they do that with their pictures?? No I answered myself pretty quickly with the photoshop answer.
It makes me wonder, because I have been on both sides of the fence with these “groups” even though I’m what is known as a “lurker” and probaby a “stinkin new kid” but… There are some blogs that I like and some I don’t. There are blogs that I no longer follow because well one because the woman was always talking about how fat she was when in her pictures she looked a size two…dude. I don’t care about fat skinny whatever. Don’t tell me some kid asked you if you’re pregnant when you’re a size two. That didn’t happen. And if it did, if that kid ever saw me he’d think “man! are you two people?!” Another for a host of reasons none of which I will get into because I don’t want to appear to be a uhm well attention whore, because when you mention said blogger that’s what people accuse you of, that or “jealous.” Which I am…definitely jealous, because if I lived where she did I would be close to one of my very best friends/roommate. And if I were her I would have lots of money, which as I have and will mention A LOT I don’t have a lot of money.
moving on!
I like blogs that you can have conversations with people. I would like this to go that route eventually. I like topic starters and like to have lots of contributions from people. In essence I like banter. I don’t like when the person who wrote the blog writes then never says anything else till the next blog. I think you should occasionally comment back. I think in my last post that I had to, because once people started commenting I kept saying “OH I remember another name that I hate!” And wanted to add more to my post.
I don’t understand “give-away blogs” at all. I mean really? You give shit away? That’s never going to happen on this blog. I don’t have the money. (Another day another post)
People talk about going to conventions like blogging is the new Amway. I will probably never understand it. Will I get to see my favorite bloggers in person? Probably never. Although I have found a blogger with the same last name as mine. Which is amazing to me. What is sad is that I commented and pointed that out and I got nothing. Gave me a flash back to high school and pointing out to someone I was playing basketball against that she had the same shoes as me, and she didn’t respond so I knocked her to the ground as much as possible during the game…but I digress. Seriously if someone EVER comes to my blog saying “I have the same last name/first name/middle name whatever to me I will definitely respond. Most likely by saying STOP STEALING MY IDENTITY! Because it’s a crappy identity. And then I will kindly ask them to clean up my credit for me.
Okay so point of this post is that I like that there are millions of blogs out there because there are enough to love and not love. Follow and not follow. Make fun of and copy.
If you blog…do it for the reasons that you want. And if you read mine, please be gentile. I’ve already beat myself up enough. Oh and if you wanna be mean well it better be for good reasons. Like I made fun of your grandmother or something. Or I will start a page just for mean comments about me. And not make any money off of it. Because google kicked me off of ad sense.

 

Baby Names I could do with out.

I’ve been sitting on this for a while, because well it’s kinda mean. And judgemental. But I’m feeling mean and judgemental. Things are going on in my brain that are making me crazy and hating life, so I have to take it out on people I don’t know about what they name their kids…First off throw a stone back at me because I named my son Oscar. I wanted to name him Samuel Oscar, but I had to switch it because his dad’s last name starts with a B, and one of my best friends told me “YOU CAN NOT GIVE YOUR SON THE INITIALS S.O.B.” So I switched. I love it. I don’t hear it very often yet it’s not something silly. Plus it’s a family name. My grandpa who I love had a brother named Oscar. So go ahead tell me your dog’s name is Oscar, I’ve heard it before. You know how many pug dogs are named Oscar? A MILLION!
First off I have to go after people who spell common names funny. I could have gone and spelled Oscar like this: Oskar, to be cool and different, and then I thought, wait, it’s already different enough. Just because every other kid has that name doesn’t mean you have to spell it different to be different. If there are too many people with the same name and you don’t like it, don’t name your kid that.
Here’s a list of names that I’ve compiled that I think are dumb silly. In MY OPINION!
Sienna
I dunno it just sounds silly to me.
Sailor
I know, I know, someone just named their baby this, but REALLY? Have you heard of Sailor Moon? It’s anime…
Sincere
I also saw it spelled Cinsere, wow.
Usnavy
If you look close…it’s U.S. Navy. Awesome
Brody
I think it’s just because I don’t like Brody Jenner all that much. But really Bro really.
Ever
Meh.
Rowan
Rowan what?? a boat?
Ever Rowan
Someone I kinda know of was seriously going to name a little girl this.
Greyson
Summer Buhreeze
I can’t remember where I saw this one, but yes that’s how they spelled Breeze…
Poppy Honey
I think Leslie just made this up.
Satchel
Famous People are silly…
Poet or Poem,
 I can’t remember which one it was that the crazy hippy named him. HIM…
Brick
from that new show The Middle. I like the show, just not the names…
Lyric
Seriously people, just because your famous
Zowie Bowie (David Bowie…really? Really…)
Enoch
Alexis (Like Kanye says “couldn’t afford one so you called your daughter alexis)
Alize…like the cheep malt liquor…awesome!
Chance
ick, I don’t know it just sounds lame to me.
Chase
Right up there with Speed.
I think the weirdest name though has to be Pilot Inspektor…or however he spells it.